A Delusional Predisposition


TRIGGER WARNING: mental illness topics discussed, adult language used throughout


weekly writings of daily life

with mental illness.

stigmas shattered.



  • Self Harm *Trigger Warning*

    I know this topic is very sensitive. I normally don’t put individual trigger warnings on my posts, but this one needs it. So, consider yourself warned. I have been writing off and on about this all week. I debated posting… Continue reading

    Self Harm *Trigger Warning*
  • Mutating Appropriately

    I met with the new-for-me NP at the mental health clinic I go to. The appointment went really well. I felt heard, finally. I was able to take in what was being said. I didn’t have a flood of uncontrollable… Continue reading

    Mutating Appropriately
  • Loaded Questions

    I have been very awkward in public lately. I’m terrified of people talking to me. Or about me. Probably because I always feel like people are talking about me. One harmless side glance starts a wave of paranoid thoughts through… Continue reading

    Loaded Questions
  • Inner Voices

    It’s been long enough that I don’t feel like I’ll ruin it if I bring it up now. My inner voices have been beautifully silent lately. It’s been about three weeks now. These are not the same voices I have… Continue reading

    Inner Voices
  • My Exhaustion

    There are nights where I get plenty of solid sleep and still wake up exhausted. I know that part of this is my depression. But another part of my sleepiness is now from being overwhelmed with the difference of my… Continue reading

    My Exhaustion
  • Retail, Behavior and Social Skills

    I always say that I’m not social anymore because of all of the years of retail I’ve worked. So, so many years of constant human interaction. Bad days, good days, sick days, it doesn’t matter. I have had to interact… Continue reading

    Retail, Behavior and Social Skills
  • Friends

    I have no desire to have friends right now. I can’t tell if I’m telling myself that because I don’t have many at all, or because it’s a real thing. But I really don’t have the capability to be a… Continue reading

    Friends
  • My [in]Ability to Think

    I was approved to see another NP at the clinic I go to. I’m glad it moved so quickly. And I’m glad the clinic I go to let me get a second opinion with another provider. I’m just so unsure… Continue reading

    My [in]Ability to Think
  • My Voices and Forest

    In the recent past, my delusions grew and got loud enough to impact every aspect of my life. I have a tendency to become obsessed with certain topics – mainly people and conversations between us, actually. Especially a specific line… Continue reading

    My Voices and Forest
  • Transition of Thought

    My psychosis episodes warp everything. They pop up out of nowhere and run my entire life until they wear out. Then it can get quiet for a few days. Then it ramps right back up into me. I have been… Continue reading

    Transition of Thought