symptoms
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Delusions
It’s all the same. The general idea for my delusions are all pretty much the same base. Someone is after me. Out to get me. Spying on me. Stalking me. Watching me. I call all of these things hallucinations all… Continue reading
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Side Note 2
These symptoms – hallucinations, delusions, paranoia.. they make me feel out of control. Like I don’t have a grip on my life. Like I’m lesser than a typical person because I can’t follow through with plans half of the time… Continue reading
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Stress Turns Into Symptoms
I know now that stress plays a huge part in my psychotic symptoms. I never realized how big of a role it carries. My symptoms are dying down again after a few days of being pretty heavy and thick. The… Continue reading
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Paranoid
My auditory hallucinations – voices, have been strong this week. Last night especially. They’ve been so strong that I have been extremely paranoid all week and it’s getting worse with the hours passing. At least I still went through with… Continue reading
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Mind and Body
I struggle with my mind and body giving out on me. The giving out of either part usually happens at different intervals. Different times. Several days of my mind not functioning properly. Then several days of my body not functioning… Continue reading
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Random Surfacing
The voices never really go away. I’ve been having a good week, but they’re still there. As frustrating as that is. They get worse at night. Once it hits the time where the sun starts to go down, it’s like… Continue reading
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Reframing
I’ve been feeling good the past week. So good I’m on edge waiting for my symptoms to take hold again. It makes me antsy when I have several decent days in a row like I have been this week. Wait,… Continue reading
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I Have to Balance
I was wondering about my symptoms that broke through last week. Once they started to quiet a little, I could think again. I’ve been thinking about it a lot since it happened actually. And I’m pretty sure that the recent… Continue reading
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The Wash and Fade
I’ve been feeling very, very blah this week. My Invega injection makes me so tired now that I don’t know what to do. I was resting most of this week because i couldn’t do anything else. And that feeling gets… Continue reading
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Bouncing Between Delusions (and Hallucinations)
I got my Invega injection today. And I honestly couldn’t wait for it. I’ve been having some breakthrough symptoms this last weekend. And last week. It felt like all the peace I had with the six or so day run… Continue reading
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Chatty
I used to be so chatty. I worked retail most all my life, so being paid to be a social butterfly was a good fit for me. But that’s all changed now. And since, I’ve noticed a change in myself… Continue reading
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“Anosognosia” and Delusions
I’m forty years old. And I didn’t understand that the voices I hear are actually hallucinations, until I was thirty eight. I thought they were my thoughts. My internal system. The paranormal. The voices are a nonstop discourse of layered… Continue reading
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Invalidation: A Rant
When someone is dismissive of my mental illness issues and symptoms, it’s invalidating. It makes me feel as if I’m the one in the wrong. I’m making all this up. That it is just an invisible hurdle. That only I… Continue reading
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Eye Shimmy (Voluntary Nystagmus) and Other Signs
I know my world is much different from what typical people have. Especially when a psychotic episode is around the corner. I’m finally noticing little signs. Signs that I need to keep an eye on. My hallucinations flare up. Every… Continue reading
A Delusional Predisposition 