phone app
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Food and Hallucinations (and More Doctor Appointments)
I keep having weeks so busy that I have no time to write. I keep forgetting to fill out my mood app every day too. Then I have to go back and try to remember what was going on on… Continue reading
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Schizoaffective Disorder and Money
It’s been a slow moving week. I suppose that’s a good thing. I’ve been sorta unmotivated lately – unfocused. I can’t help but worry about the future. I’m paranoid about the next steps and what that looks like in my… Continue reading
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I Don’t Think I’m Bipolar, And I’m Mindblown
Again, I’m going to talk about my last psychotic episode. The one I had that ended last week, er, the week before, now. It lasted longer than I thought. Well, it started further back than I originally thought. I went… Continue reading
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I Realized I was Depressed and Paranoid
I’m still upset at life. I still don’t know if I’m going to continue writing this blog or not. It’ll have been three years of it already in a few weeks. I haven’t decided if I’ll renew my domain name… Continue reading
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The Voices Lately
The voices have been very tolerable lately. I haven’t been talking about them the last few entries and I figured I’d touch base with them this week. Things have been good – they’ve been quiet. But I’ve been taking my… Continue reading
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Patterns of My Psychosis are Surfacing
Holy shit, that’s it. That’s part of the prodromal phase for me. I pull away from people. I can see it now. People start annoying the shit out of me, for no reason. I suddenly hate getting messages and calls,… Continue reading
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Hallucinations and an Ablation
It’s Sunday afternoon and my back pain is making me nauseous. It’s 4:16pm and all i’ve had is a Red Bull and a Chobani Flip. Quite a stark contrast from the last few days. I hurt. My lower back feels… Continue reading
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Signs of an Episode
There are a few things that are signs that a psychotic episode is going to happen or is happening to me. The more I think about it, I’m able to slowly put two and two together a bit better as… Continue reading
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Bipolar Rage
I can’t keep doing the same things and expect things to be different. That’s literally insanity. I have been an oversharer most of my life. But that’s not me anymore. Well, rather, I don’t want to be that person anymore.… Continue reading
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I Had Lost The Details
I used to think most things were endless and unobtainable. Chaotic and confusing. Like the amount, or types, of birds in the air. There are too many to even start counting or naming. The fruits at the grocery store –… Continue reading
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Medication Adherence
It’s like one good thing happens and then a bunch of terrible things follow suit. I didn’t have therapy last week because of the fourth of July holiday was that same day. Today, Thursday, 40 min before our session, my… Continue reading
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Anxious With The Wait
It’s been a strange feeling week. I’m so anxious for my disability hearing next month that it’s making me nauseous and so anxious I can barely stand to be around myself. I’m glad I get the opportunity to speak and… Continue reading
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Medications: Part Four
Honestly, I have always been awful about taking my meds. Any of them. All of them. I’ve gone days or even weeks without taking them. Then I would start taking them again suddenly and get that roller coaster effect. I… Continue reading
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My Exhaustion
There are nights where I get plenty of solid sleep and still wake up exhausted. I know that part of this is my depression. But another part of my sleepiness is now from being overwhelmed with the difference of my… Continue reading
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Daylio
Daylio is the name of my mood app. It’s an eye opening tool for me. I can track different moods that I have throughout the day. I can apply whatever “activity” or symptoms within those different moods. Everything is super… Continue reading
A Delusional Predisposition 