A Delusional Predisposition

Neutrality

  • Mental and Physical Symptoms are Taking Over

    I’ve been hearing shit this weekend still. Just like last week, most all of the “neighbors” are back. Fml. The “third floor neighbor” voices are here again. I saw a random guy – probably the new third floor neighbor’s son,… Continue reading

    Mental and Physical Symptoms are Taking Over

  • Stress and Hallucinations

    My anxiety has been out of control ever since the airbags randomly deployed in the Pilot at the end of March. I’m talking pretty much daily panic attacks. I’ve been using my TouchPoints constantly. I’ve been taking my Clonazepam and… Continue reading

    Stress and Hallucinations

  • I Got Sick Sitting by Myself

    I feel horrible that I couldn’t put a blog entry together last week. I wrote up some stuff, but I absolutely hated all of it. So I just didn’t post anything. I feel like I have nothing constructive to say… Continue reading

    I Got Sick Sitting by Myself

  • My Anxiety Caused Motion Sickness and Other Shituations…

    I’m running on fumes. Emotionally, physically, financially. The whole picture is thin right now. The good thing is that I cleaned out the Pilot (on Friday afternoon last week). Got it ready for today – for getting rid of it… Continue reading

    My Anxiety Caused Motion Sickness and Other Shituations…

  • Medications: Part Fourteen

    I had a really good weekend. I’m feeling less anxious from the Honda’s airbags randomly deploying as the days pass. I’m noticing I’m still on edge a bit. I’m still needing my PRN anxiety medication, Clonazepam, 0.5 mg, a little… Continue reading

    Medications: Part Fourteen

  • My Car Traumas 

    I’ve been stressed this week. Well, actually, I’ve been super anxious. It’s from what happened with my Honda. I didn’t really go into it last week because I wanted to cover another topic. But I’ll go into it this week.… Continue reading

    My Car Traumas 

  • How Mental Illness Affected my Ability to Think

    I’m exhausted today. It’s Friday and I’ve had a helluva week. Between the Pilot’s airbags randomly deploying while I was driving home on Saturday (yeah, I know, scary, huh?) and dealing with my finances, I’m beat. And I’ve been having… Continue reading

    How Mental Illness Affected my Ability to Think

  • What I’ve Learned Advocating for Myself in Healthcare (and more!)

    As down on myself as I get for not being social, I have been more social the past few months. I just haven’t really made any more friends. Which is fine right now. I’m not gonna get down on myself… Continue reading

    What I’ve Learned Advocating for Myself in Healthcare (and more!)

  • My Automatic Self Loathing Has Been Quelled

    With that rheumatologist appointment last week… I was unpacking it in therapy on Wednesday this week. My therapist said how mindblowing it was. She said it was a horrible thing that happened, but at the same time, she was really… Continue reading

    My Automatic Self Loathing Has Been Quelled

  • My Changes and a Disclaimer

    I haven’t been having many symptoms lately. It’s scary honestly. I don’t know when they’ll surface again. It’s like I’m on a rollercoaster, right at the top of a big hill, after you’ve gotten past all the clicks, and you… Continue reading

    My Changes and a Disclaimer

  • Nano PRP and Group Therapy

    It’s been a decent week. I got my nano PRP injections today (it’s Friday). The stem cells from umbilical cords. My knees feel cushioned this afternoon. So does my left big toe. My knees have been incredibly painful the past… Continue reading

    Nano PRP and Group Therapy

  • Neutrality

    So, I have a really, really tough time trying to “love” myself. This isn’t a new thing either. It’s not like I woke up this morning and realized this. I’ve hated myself for so many decades that the thought of… Continue reading

    Neutrality