A Delusional Predisposition

TRIGGER WARNING: mental illness topics discussed, adult language used throughout

weekly writings of daily life

with mental illness.

stigmas shattered.

  • Vein Ablations and Therapy

    So, the vein ablations are done. Thank goodness. The photo with this entry shows just how drastic of a difference the procedures have made. It’s amazing. I mean, I knew my feet and legs were discolored and swollen, but I… Continue reading

    Vein Ablations and Therapy

  • Trauma, Pain Levels, and ADHD

    I woke up in incredible amounts of pain on Wednesday this week. Incredible. I could barely fucking move. When I finally did, I had to move very, very slowly. Even on my morning walk with Bruce that day, I had… Continue reading

    Trauma, Pain Levels, and ADHD

  • C•PTSD and Trauma (Medical and Authoritative) 

    I’m 99.9% sure of my PTSD is actually C•PTSD.  I’ve never really given it much thought until this last weekend. I mean, I have, but I haven’t put that much thought into it. I guess I never really looked up… Continue reading

    C•PTSD and Trauma (Medical and Authoritative) 

  • The Time I Started A Forest Fire

    I had a good therapy session this week. My therapist has just gotten her EMDR certification a few weeks ago, maybe a month ago now. And she’s using me as a guinea pig – which I love. We worked on… Continue reading

    The Time I Started A Forest Fire

  • Anesthetics Frustrations But Then a Surprisingly Good Visit With My Psych NP

    I’m angry this week. Frustrated is maybe a better word. I know it’s from the anesthetics last week. I know it is. It’s always like this. After every procedure. I really wish it wasn’t like this though. It’s super annoying.… Continue reading

    Anesthetics Frustrations But Then a Surprisingly Good Visit With My Psych NP

  • Being Social With Schizoaffective Disorder

    I don’t know why I can’t just go out and about and be happy that someone wants to spend time with me. Oh wait, I do know why, it’s the voices. They’re always fucking shit up. Everytime I’m away from… Continue reading

    Being Social With Schizoaffective Disorder

  • Capacity

    I was having a brunch date with someone Saturday (it went really well!) and he reminded me that people only have so much capacity to deal with things, or to be there for others. Whatever things those may be. Whatever… Continue reading

    Capacity

  • The Bug Situation and Being Emotional

    This is how my week started… It’s Monday, and I have been so incredibly, unbearably anxious and paranoid lately. Like, crying at least several times every single day, for the past several weeks. And I don’t know what to do… Continue reading

    The Bug Situation and Being Emotional

  • I’m Not Who I Once Was

    I used to freak the fuck out. Over react to everything. Screaming. Yelling. Texting people nonstop about my random issues and problems. I answered the phone today when I shouldn’t have. I was frustrated about my car air and vents… Continue reading

    I’m Not Who I Once Was

  • People Are Ridiculous

    It’s been a stupid, shitty week again. High pain levels, and night terrors practically every night. My pain and night terrors have been taking turns waking me up every stupid fucking night. I’m exhausted. Last week was a doozy too.… Continue reading

    People Are Ridiculous